There was this investment banker who decided to sink part of his bonus into the acquisition of a large executive jet. On the day of purchase he invited 26 of his colleagues, investment bankers all, to come with him on a joyride. Taking off was a doddle, but he had not anticipated the complexities of cloud, altitude etc. and as a consequence they all died instantly when he crashed into the side of a mountain.
Soon after, St Peter heard prolonged knocking and ringing at the Pearly Gates, and opened them cautiously.
The ex-owner of the jet said "AK yah, we've had a bit of a mishap with a mountain, and we'd like to come in. We're investment bankers, and we're loaded. If possible, we would like the 76 virgins package".
Peter was not sure about this, said Heaven was a bit full at the moment, and asked them to wait while he checked with the Almighty.
He came into the Presence, and said "O God, there are 27 investment bankers at the gate, wanting in".
God said, "Oh God", and stroked his beard. Not wanting to appear unmerciful, he said, "Let five of them in, and tell the others to go to Hell."
Peter bowed, and left. A few minutes later (metaphorically speaking, since there is no actual time in Heaven) he returned looking flustered. "They've gone!" he said.
"What, all of them?" said God.
"Not the bankers", said Peter, "the Gates".