Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Trust in Bush

Debating Missile Shield on openDemocracy

Iron Mike:C'mon're not thinking this fully through.

Me: You're right Mike. I must think it through fully.

The US gets bombs which can kill 200,000 in an instant, so Russia, UK France and China must have them too, and this keeps the peace for 50 years because they have this effect of raising the threshold at which politicians declare war, but only if the politician is Sane.
US UK Russian French and Chinese leaders are Sane and to be trusted with nukes even though sometimes they behave more like cheese eating surrender monkeys.

Sane politicians now have some 25,000 nukes worldwide (a 50% reduction on Cold War times), equivalent to 5 tonnes of TNT for every man woman and child on the planet, which is a really Sane and Trustworthy amount to have.

Every schoolboy knows that "Nuclear weapons keep the peace".

Q: So why not give ten Nukes to every prime minister and president on the planet and stop all wars world wide?
A: Because some politicians are untrustworthy and might be mad enough to use them.

But any politician, evern the least trustworthy, can see how powerful it makes you to have nukes (after all , why else should UK and France be on the UNSC?), and how safe, and so Israel, Pakistan and India now have some too, but luckily they are all Sane and can be Trusted not to use them, but if North Korea and Iran get them they are definitely not sane and so must not be allowed to have them. And if Mr O. Bin Laden (not those other Bin Ladens, mind, the business associates of George Bush Senior, who are all so sane and trustworthy that we might sell them a dozen H-bombs if we can get them to agree on a price), if Osama got some he is definitely mad enough to use them, and would probably also make it worse by going "heheheheheheh" as he did so.

So Iran must be stopped even if it means dropping nuclear weapons on their factories. The world will trust us and understand that we only do this because the wily Iranian leader Mr ArmoureDinnerJacket has buried them so far below ground that he leaves us no choice. (Russia can bomb Iran too, if it would make it feel more included?).

But when we have stopped Iran, there are other Mad Dictators who will feel the need to have the security that a only a solid arsenal of nukes can provide. We Realists have to face the fact that proliferating nuclear weapons are a wee bit of a Problem. Mr Kissinger has said this and he is Mr Trustworthy Sane Kissinger.

So what is the answer? Definitely not to negotiate in good faith to rid the world of nuclear weapons forever and completely, even though we did cut them by 50% in the START treaty, and even though that is what Mr Henry Kissinger thinks should be done.

We should definitely not agree to take a $100 chainsaw to all the ICBMs while they are in their silos (yes, folks, that's all it takes to kill an ICBM) That is a stupid answer that comes from stupid greenies and peaceniks who are weedy and stupid and cannot Think.

The answer is to spend tens or hundreds of billions of dollars in dotting the world with high technology Missile Shield gear that will be able to destroy these self same ICBMs while they are in the air. Yes siree. While they are in the actual air, and coming our way. Bang! Zap! Problem solved. And if Russia objects, they can have some of the technology, and they can kill our missiles when they are in the air too, and coming their way. And Russian and US technology can kill Iranian and Chinese ICBMs while they are in the air too, even if the Chinese come up with Multiple Independent Targeting for their warheads which are wily and cunning enough to try to Get Past The Missile Sheild (which they will not be able to do, anyway). And the Russian shield will be able to kill the US incoming ICBMs just so long as they keep up with their payments. They can trust us that the SatNav stuff will all work even though our countries are at war.Why ever should it not? Trust us...just trust us.

I try to trust, Mike, but when I sing "Jesus wants me for a sunbeam", I can only see those rays coming out of a mushroom cloud.


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